Impatience

This whole packing thing consumes me. Add on having to take care of a kid and a baby doesn't make it easier. I have a baby that can only fall asleep when we carry her, rock her and walk around. Then I also have a kid who whines and whines it gets to my nerves. She's also having difficulties with obedience too. We have had 3 "meltdowns" with regards to this. And I have threatened to rake out the cane more often than I ever had in her 3.5 years. It doesn't help that at the same time, I am so busy I am neglecting her. Plus we are trying to learn to be more independent with regards to her sleep. That she doesn't need to see me when she wakes up. Like today, she woke up twice and whined and cried cos she didn't see me. I, can't stand that crying, scolded her instead. It doesn't help that the 1st time round I was trying to get Emily to sleep and her crying woke Emily up. My mum said I should comfort her but I don't want to encourage that behavior. I do at the end but not until she stops crying on her own.
Essentially, I am irritated. I don't want to have to be in the room waiting for her to sleep and esp when it can take up to one hour! That is after our talk and prayer! And i feel that my presence in the room makes it worse. I guess having packing to do and baby to take care of, I am super impatient and frustrated with her like that.

Sigh...I really do hope that she'll learn to sleep on her own in her room soon. This is also our fault that we cultivated that expectation that we need to be beside her when she sleeps. She can't accept that while we are not in the room we are still in the house. I guess now is also not the time to teach these esp when there's so many changes. I hope I don't make the same mistake with Emily.