There are some days you just don't wanna do anything.
Tonight is one of those days.
As much as Emily's sleeping is improving, she has started having the runny nose that Eliza had had three days ago. Sigh..so a stuffy nose night, praying she will still sleep well at night despite this. Had a hard time getting her to sleep...poor gal. It didn't help that we decided to check out the Nara festival that starts at 5pm today and came home late...late like 730pm? That's not late in singapore terms but late in our terms with a baby that sleeps at 7pm (which means winding down by 630pm). Eliza's still quite flexible so even though she didn't take a nap today, (and i tried to get her to have it but she isn't tired enough), we sent her to sleep by 8pm. Usually we'll send her to sleep earlier, at about 730pm.
This is really so different in SG where 7pm is nothing near bedtime...cos 7pm is like the time you start to do stuff, cos it's after work time, time to catch up with friends time, tv time etc. Maybe over here cos most of our friends aren't here, and with two kids to take care of (and no help from my mil like before), the kids sleep early, and our nights are seemingly longer cos they sleep early! So i get to do my cooking preps like chopping vegs/meat/fruits. Really food preparation is quite tedious!
So tonight i decided to give food prep a pass and will do tuna puff pastry tomorrow for lunch...and prob pull out the frozen stash of food for dinner. Wanted to do tortilla roll but it needs some preps which i don't really want to do tonight.
Some things to do in the coming week:
- prepare Emily's first food! rice cereal! wonder whether to grind it or just cook it directly...sooo many ways to do it till i'm so confused. I'm trying not to buy packaged ready made foods (including our meals as it is cheaper to cook from the 'original' foods than buying ready-made ones)
- plan Eliza's day. REALLY gotta plan, it is so much better when i have some activites and special things for her to do & learn. Even playdoh/painting/puzzle time.
- Emily's sleep. It has been a week trying to get Emily's sleep in order and I foresee there will be more to come, like getting her to take her 20min nap (when will she outgrow this?), and then Beco-ing her to get the rest of the nap cos she is still tired but can't get back to sleep in her cot.
- food price comparison. trying to list unit costs down so i don't forget as the numbers seem so similar.
- plan our meals more specifically. So that i'm not like planning what to cook the night before.
- print photos for photo frames. Something i've been so slow at starting to get it done....
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Impatience
This whole packing thing consumes me. Add on having to take care of a kid and a baby doesn't make it easier. I have a baby that can only fall asleep when we carry her, rock her and walk around. Then I also have a kid who whines and whines it gets to my nerves. She's also having difficulties with obedience too. We have had 3 "meltdowns" with regards to this. And I have threatened to rake out the cane more often than I ever had in her 3.5 years. It doesn't help that at the same time, I am so busy I am neglecting her. Plus we are trying to learn to be more independent with regards to her sleep. That she doesn't need to see me when she wakes up. Like today, she woke up twice and whined and cried cos she didn't see me. I, can't stand that crying, scolded her instead. It doesn't help that the 1st time round I was trying to get Emily to sleep and her crying woke Emily up. My mum said I should comfort her but I don't want to encourage that behavior. I do at the end but not until she stops crying on her own.
Essentially, I am irritated. I don't want to have to be in the room waiting for her to sleep and esp when it can take up to one hour! That is after our talk and prayer! And i feel that my presence in the room makes it worse. I guess having packing to do and baby to take care of, I am super impatient and frustrated with her like that.
Sigh...I really do hope that she'll learn to sleep on her own in her room soon. This is also our fault that we cultivated that expectation that we need to be beside her when she sleeps. She can't accept that while we are not in the room we are still in the house. I guess now is also not the time to teach these esp when there's so many changes. I hope I don't make the same mistake with Emily.
Essentially, I am irritated. I don't want to have to be in the room waiting for her to sleep and esp when it can take up to one hour! That is after our talk and prayer! And i feel that my presence in the room makes it worse. I guess having packing to do and baby to take care of, I am super impatient and frustrated with her like that.
Sigh...I really do hope that she'll learn to sleep on her own in her room soon. This is also our fault that we cultivated that expectation that we need to be beside her when she sleeps. She can't accept that while we are not in the room we are still in the house. I guess now is also not the time to teach these esp when there's so many changes. I hope I don't make the same mistake with Emily.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Getting ready for Emily's arrival
It's the anticipation. We have gotten ready my mil to take care of Eliza, gotten all the food stuffs ready for the confinement food. I've packed my hospital bag. I've gone through with Eliza a few times to prepare her for these few days, we've read a book on arrival of baby. But we know not what will happen...how will Emily's arrival be. We have somewhat planned her arrival...somewhat like Eliza's (just that we have waited and waited for Eliza to arrive till the delivery had to be induced). This time the labour might also be induced for many reasons...because we wanted enough time to prepare to leave for australia, to be able to have good buffer time to make the kids passports (1week+), apply for visa (4-6weeks). Also because we hope that i would have finished my confinement period before Ww leaves and that we can do Emily's 1st month celebration before he leaves. So ideally, 1st may would be great so if Emily decides to come out earlier spontaneously that will be great. But then my gynae is going to be away on thursay! argh..so we likely brought forward her arrival 3 days earlier. I'm not sure...but we'll talk with our gynae later.
Looking forward to see Emily though! :) praying for a smooth and safe delivery, and a healthy little girl.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
A year of separations
This is the first round. Of ww going to Canberra to start school first and familiarize the place. So this first round is 5 weeks. It's been ok so far, and missing each other especially since we have not been apart for more than 2 weeks. It think that was his school Vietnam trip which he had to go twice.
The next round will be after the birth of baby2 where he'll be going first to settle the rental of a new place and getting the necessary furnishing needed. I'm starting to wonder if we could still go together instead of him going first.
And the last round would be when he goes to UK and US to do his archival research for 5-6 weeks. Sigh. Will miss him loads then. So will Eliza. Esp since daddy's always the more playful one around.
The next round will be after the birth of baby2 where he'll be going first to settle the rental of a new place and getting the necessary furnishing needed. I'm starting to wonder if we could still go together instead of him going first.
And the last round would be when he goes to UK and US to do his archival research for 5-6 weeks. Sigh. Will miss him loads then. So will Eliza. Esp since daddy's always the more playful one around.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
End march
It's end march.
Weiwen is back in SG after 5 weeks in Canberra to start school. It has been wonderful to have him back *grins*, to have his company and extra help with Eliza (like washing the bottles!). Eliza has been elated to have him back despite denying that the 1st week he was away.
So i have another month to wait upon the arrival of Emily. Yes Emily. We have chosen her name, with the help of Eliza whom when asked on several occasions chosen Emily over the name Esther. Now she calls my big bump 'mummy's baby' or 'Emily'. I'm not sure if she understands what it means to have a baby sister. She will affectionately talk to Emily, asking her what present she wants, saying she'll feed her milk & bathe for her. My prayer for both of them that they will grow into a close relationship as sisters, to encourage each other as they grow, to inspire each other in walking with God.
We have a good mind to stop at two. Just two girls. Perfect for road trips. Even though more will be nice..but i'm unsure of wanting to go through another pregnancy (it's not the most fun), nor am i sure i want to deal with the baby care round 3. Ha...but if it happens in many years to come, that let it be God's will.
Meanwhile, we enjoy each day as God blesses. We enjoy the fun days with Eliza, playing Lego with her, going out to the park/playground, drawing, writing, reading etc. We also deal with the usual defiance on her part, her want yet not want issues, her coughing this week that makes me cringe and wake up at night. We love her so much. We love to hear her talk. I think i love this stage more than any of her other stages so far.
I still have my cooking skills to hone. And i'm not pressured to cook cos my mil will always ask whether we're going over to eat which we still do 2-3 days a week. And yes, i'm a little lazy....i would rather buy in. We're in SG! Anyway, we're making pizza again tonight. :) For Eliza's fun & daddy who have missed our last 2 pizza making. I think the crunch will be when we are in aust, when i definately have to cook everyday and/or make freeze food. And i'm realizing the foods that i don't really like to cook and eat, esp bean based foods, mashed soups, one pot foods, seafood (with the exception of fish).
Really need to spend my time more wisely.
The weight is getting on to me and I'm feeling the exhaustion as well.
I'm still fuzzy as to how we will do things when Emily arrives.
Weiwen is back in SG after 5 weeks in Canberra to start school. It has been wonderful to have him back *grins*, to have his company and extra help with Eliza (like washing the bottles!). Eliza has been elated to have him back despite denying that the 1st week he was away.
So i have another month to wait upon the arrival of Emily. Yes Emily. We have chosen her name, with the help of Eliza whom when asked on several occasions chosen Emily over the name Esther. Now she calls my big bump 'mummy's baby' or 'Emily'. I'm not sure if she understands what it means to have a baby sister. She will affectionately talk to Emily, asking her what present she wants, saying she'll feed her milk & bathe for her. My prayer for both of them that they will grow into a close relationship as sisters, to encourage each other as they grow, to inspire each other in walking with God.
We have a good mind to stop at two. Just two girls. Perfect for road trips. Even though more will be nice..but i'm unsure of wanting to go through another pregnancy (it's not the most fun), nor am i sure i want to deal with the baby care round 3. Ha...but if it happens in many years to come, that let it be God's will.
Meanwhile, we enjoy each day as God blesses. We enjoy the fun days with Eliza, playing Lego with her, going out to the park/playground, drawing, writing, reading etc. We also deal with the usual defiance on her part, her want yet not want issues, her coughing this week that makes me cringe and wake up at night. We love her so much. We love to hear her talk. I think i love this stage more than any of her other stages so far.
I still have my cooking skills to hone. And i'm not pressured to cook cos my mil will always ask whether we're going over to eat which we still do 2-3 days a week. And yes, i'm a little lazy....i would rather buy in. We're in SG! Anyway, we're making pizza again tonight. :) For Eliza's fun & daddy who have missed our last 2 pizza making. I think the crunch will be when we are in aust, when i definately have to cook everyday and/or make freeze food. And i'm realizing the foods that i don't really like to cook and eat, esp bean based foods, mashed soups, one pot foods, seafood (with the exception of fish).
Really need to spend my time more wisely.
The weight is getting on to me and I'm feeling the exhaustion as well.
I'm still fuzzy as to how we will do things when Emily arrives.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Housewife-ing
I hate rewriting my blog posts. But so it is. Tap something wrong andthere goes everything.
Anyway here goes again.
I've stopped work since last Wednesday and it has been good. The feeling of not working!! And being paid (my maternity leave) till i leave singapore in june. But of course that means I'll have to get in the groove of doing housework which I don't really like and cooking which I'm not really familiar with. But still I hav to start somewhere.
Not working also means that I get to spend a whole load of time with Eliza. And I'm kinda thankful that she goes to school in the mornings so I get my 'break'. Usually on work days my time with her is really limited to just getting the daily routines done. When I come home from work there's just enough time for me to bathe and eat dinner and shoo her off to bed. of course I don't have to do mealtime with her which can be difficult with my lil picky eater.
Anyway so far this week I've been at my mil's place for meals cos she said that there's a lot of food to finish cooking. So I've been enjoying my favourite braised pork with rice meals for 2 days, which Eliza had rejected by today and settled eventually for rice rolled in seaweed (sushi style). By tmr I'll be cooking for Eliza and me. Meal planning is a bit of a headache sometimes, especially when i have to think of cooking food Eliza will eat. Anyway, tomorrow we'll be having roasted potatoes with bacon and veg or chicken; and spaghetti on thurs.
I've been enjoying my days with Eliza :) we have been drawing and drawing, doing her homework, playdoh-ing, cuttin paper, colouring, reading, going to the playground, playing my iPod touch puzzles, watching her fav BabyFirst. Have been mulling over whether to get the Kumon activity books which are really fun but ex. It's $50+ for 4-5 books, even with a discount.
And it's been 4 days since Ww has left for Canberra. So far we have video skyped (which is the most ex due to the amount of data used), we have used whatsapp most of the time to chat and talked on skype voice. He's still using the 3G data plan cos wifi seems to be hard to come by, even inthe campus where his wifi access will need to be activated only in a weeks time. So we're kinda missing each other, especially when our usual talktimes after Eliza sleeps is disrupted by different timezones.
30 more days to go!
Meanwhile I hope I'll be able to b less sluggish and use my time I have much better.
Anyway here goes again.
I've stopped work since last Wednesday and it has been good. The feeling of not working!! And being paid (my maternity leave) till i leave singapore in june. But of course that means I'll have to get in the groove of doing housework which I don't really like and cooking which I'm not really familiar with. But still I hav to start somewhere.
Not working also means that I get to spend a whole load of time with Eliza. And I'm kinda thankful that she goes to school in the mornings so I get my 'break'. Usually on work days my time with her is really limited to just getting the daily routines done. When I come home from work there's just enough time for me to bathe and eat dinner and shoo her off to bed. of course I don't have to do mealtime with her which can be difficult with my lil picky eater.
Anyway so far this week I've been at my mil's place for meals cos she said that there's a lot of food to finish cooking. So I've been enjoying my favourite braised pork with rice meals for 2 days, which Eliza had rejected by today and settled eventually for rice rolled in seaweed (sushi style). By tmr I'll be cooking for Eliza and me. Meal planning is a bit of a headache sometimes, especially when i have to think of cooking food Eliza will eat. Anyway, tomorrow we'll be having roasted potatoes with bacon and veg or chicken; and spaghetti on thurs.
I've been enjoying my days with Eliza :) we have been drawing and drawing, doing her homework, playdoh-ing, cuttin paper, colouring, reading, going to the playground, playing my iPod touch puzzles, watching her fav BabyFirst. Have been mulling over whether to get the Kumon activity books which are really fun but ex. It's $50+ for 4-5 books, even with a discount.
And it's been 4 days since Ww has left for Canberra. So far we have video skyped (which is the most ex due to the amount of data used), we have used whatsapp most of the time to chat and talked on skype voice. He's still using the 3G data plan cos wifi seems to be hard to come by, even inthe campus where his wifi access will need to be activated only in a weeks time. So we're kinda missing each other, especially when our usual talktimes after Eliza sleeps is disrupted by different timezones.
30 more days to go!
Meanwhile I hope I'll be able to b less sluggish and use my time I have much better.
Wednesday, January 05, 2011
Moved
We finally moved! ...well, not to Australia yet, to my mum's house for the interim.
Since we have sold our less than 5 year, fully renovated flat at our desired price, we have no place to stay till baby 2 arrives and we leave for Canberra. We actually sold our house and later found out that I'll need to take x-rays for my visa. By then I knew I was expecting. And even though my gynae said its relatively safe and low risk to take x-rays, I had made a decision not to go ahead with it, just in case.
This actually meant that suddenly all our plans have to take a sudden stop. By then we had already bought the tickets, sold the house and I had told my company that I was leaving. It was crazy. It took me many days to accept this change. In the midst of it, I had to find a school for Eliza and because I didn't want her in the afternoon session there was barely any school left with a space for her. I was stuck between choosing a childcare and an expensive private preschool. Thank God he led me to finding a kindergarten for her. Relieved!
Since we have sold our less than 5 year, fully renovated flat at our desired price, we have no place to stay till baby 2 arrives and we leave for Canberra. We actually sold our house and later found out that I'll need to take x-rays for my visa. By then I knew I was expecting. And even though my gynae said its relatively safe and low risk to take x-rays, I had made a decision not to go ahead with it, just in case.
This actually meant that suddenly all our plans have to take a sudden stop. By then we had already bought the tickets, sold the house and I had told my company that I was leaving. It was crazy. It took me many days to accept this change. In the midst of it, I had to find a school for Eliza and because I didn't want her in the afternoon session there was barely any school left with a space for her. I was stuck between choosing a childcare and an expensive private preschool. Thank God he led me to finding a kindergarten for her. Relieved!
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Exhausted and sluggish
I have been feeling sluggish and tired and lazy boned. I didn't remember my 1st trimester during my 1st pregnancy to be so exhausting. Sometimes I wonder whether it's my incomplete sleep. I mean I get woken in the middle of the night by Eliza wanting some attention due to her scratching or her talking, or I get woken from my nap by ww cos we gotta move on to something like dinner or whatever. I wish I can sleep to
my heart's content, without anyone waking me up so that I can complete my sleep! Sigh.
Wasn't too fun when I threw up all my meals yesterday, the last one at 12:40am. Yucks. :6 but at least I felt better after that, usually. What I eat have to be chosen carefully. Fruits usually don't go down well...so I'm still sticking to meat, rice or fried noodles, actually anything unhealthy works quite well.
I'm still looking forward to better and more normal days ahead. There's lots to do. To pack and sort and prepare for our mega move. I can't do those when i feel so bed-ridden and pukey I really pray this nauseating 1st tri passes. I am so sluggish, I can't get any work done around the house, and I'm feeling kinda bad abt it.
my heart's content, without anyone waking me up so that I can complete my sleep! Sigh.
Wasn't too fun when I threw up all my meals yesterday, the last one at 12:40am. Yucks. :6 but at least I felt better after that, usually. What I eat have to be chosen carefully. Fruits usually don't go down well...so I'm still sticking to meat, rice or fried noodles, actually anything unhealthy works quite well.
I'm still looking forward to better and more normal days ahead. There's lots to do. To pack and sort and prepare for our mega move. I can't do those when i feel so bed-ridden and pukey I really pray this nauseating 1st tri passes. I am so sluggish, I can't get any work done around the house, and I'm feeling kinda bad abt it.
Monday, September 20, 2010
God's timing
Our wedding verse came from our favourite section of Ecclesiastics...that there is a time for everything..
"1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
...
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him. "
Ecc 3:1-11
I opened the devotional book to today's date and it's about God's timing.
"Of course, God's plans don't always unfold according to our wishes or at the time of our own choosing. Nonetheless, we can trust the benevolent, all-knowing Father as we wait patiently for Him to reveal Himself. Until God's plans are made clear to us, our task is to simply to walk in faith and never lose hope, knowing that His ways are always the best."
We have waited...and when God gives, even at the oddest of times, we still give thanks. Still we'll need to trust an walk in faith for the next journey that is ahead of us, a journey we weren't expecting. So we have unexpectedly expected. And just when we thought, after trying for a year, that i'll be unlikely to conceive....and was prepared to find out why, and was prepared to enjoy life in Canberra with one kid and lots of energy...God surprises us. In a nice way, though. :)
"1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
...
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him. "
Ecc 3:1-11
I opened the devotional book to today's date and it's about God's timing.
"Of course, God's plans don't always unfold according to our wishes or at the time of our own choosing. Nonetheless, we can trust the benevolent, all-knowing Father as we wait patiently for Him to reveal Himself. Until God's plans are made clear to us, our task is to simply to walk in faith and never lose hope, knowing that His ways are always the best."
We have waited...and when God gives, even at the oddest of times, we still give thanks. Still we'll need to trust an walk in faith for the next journey that is ahead of us, a journey we weren't expecting. So we have unexpectedly expected. And just when we thought, after trying for a year, that i'll be unlikely to conceive....and was prepared to find out why, and was prepared to enjoy life in Canberra with one kid and lots of energy...God surprises us. In a nice way, though. :)
Saturday, July 24, 2010
This in-between
We are kinda in between now. The plans that we can make is as far as next year and there goes that uncertainty. Uncertain of ...
- whether we'll be able to 'survive' there. ie if i can cook everyday for stuff that's good and healthy for Eliza too.
- how long Ww will take to finish his phd. the aim is 2years so we don't incur so much costs in terms of school fees...by our rough calculation, we have only enough to last us till end of our 2.5yr there.
- what is going to happen after Ww has finished his phd. Will he be able to find a job there? (esp when the demand for history teachers don't seem to be a lot) Will we be coming back to singapore? What will he be doing if he comes back?
- whether we can tolerate the cold (yes cold is nice but i don't quite fancy the idea of living through sub-zero winter...plus Eliza & I have dry skin so loads of moisturizing to be done all over)
- whether we should have continue to try for a baby now or when we're there. I mean we have tried for a year and still no results...seems like the 67% chance of getting pregnant with one less fallopian tube seems more difficult than it sounded to me initially. If we have one now, i'll have to deal with all the changes while being pregnant. If we have one later in Australia, i'll have to deal with all the changes alone with Eliza, in a foreign land. After being so used to having family around to help, I'm not sure if i can manage it alone with a toddler. (somewhat la..tho there's still Ww..but he'll be studying most of the time..which is like working hours)...oh and a toddler who isn't too warmed up to babies.
Sigh...if it's already so difficult to get pregnant (ok i know there're really more people who have difficulties but i kinda hope that Eliza and her sibling's, (if she has one), age be not too far away). Anyway, if it's so difficult, trying again after another year might just mean trying another year without results. :S Amongst all these realities, i'm also so aware that God is the one who is authority over all these things, whether he gives or not give is His blessing and it is a good thing even when i might not think so.
Anyway all this uncertainties is our walking on water. Stepping out in faith, with trust in Him who gives all things abundantly to us. This is something i'll con't to struggle with, with God...but i know His grace is sufficient for us.
- whether we'll be able to 'survive' there. ie if i can cook everyday for stuff that's good and healthy for Eliza too.
- how long Ww will take to finish his phd. the aim is 2years so we don't incur so much costs in terms of school fees...by our rough calculation, we have only enough to last us till end of our 2.5yr there.
- what is going to happen after Ww has finished his phd. Will he be able to find a job there? (esp when the demand for history teachers don't seem to be a lot) Will we be coming back to singapore? What will he be doing if he comes back?
- whether we can tolerate the cold (yes cold is nice but i don't quite fancy the idea of living through sub-zero winter...plus Eliza & I have dry skin so loads of moisturizing to be done all over)
- whether we should have continue to try for a baby now or when we're there. I mean we have tried for a year and still no results...seems like the 67% chance of getting pregnant with one less fallopian tube seems more difficult than it sounded to me initially. If we have one now, i'll have to deal with all the changes while being pregnant. If we have one later in Australia, i'll have to deal with all the changes alone with Eliza, in a foreign land. After being so used to having family around to help, I'm not sure if i can manage it alone with a toddler. (somewhat la..tho there's still Ww..but he'll be studying most of the time..which is like working hours)...oh and a toddler who isn't too warmed up to babies.
Sigh...if it's already so difficult to get pregnant (ok i know there're really more people who have difficulties but i kinda hope that Eliza and her sibling's, (if she has one), age be not too far away). Anyway, if it's so difficult, trying again after another year might just mean trying another year without results. :S Amongst all these realities, i'm also so aware that God is the one who is authority over all these things, whether he gives or not give is His blessing and it is a good thing even when i might not think so.
Anyway all this uncertainties is our walking on water. Stepping out in faith, with trust in Him who gives all things abundantly to us. This is something i'll con't to struggle with, with God...but i know His grace is sufficient for us.